Upbuild Coaching Bits: Making Requests

Making a request is a skill that helps you move clients into action. Action is important because if clients don’t take action, they won’t experience the change they are wanting.

A request is using an empowering question to make a specific request of someone, often taking a “good idea” to the next level of action. Requests begin with “will you…” or “would you be willing…” and are usually time-bound, meaning that there is a “by when” date associated with the request. The client should be able to respond with “yes,” “no,” or make suggestions for changes to the request.

Examples of a request:

• Will you meditate for ten minutes a day for the next month?

• Would you be willing to make a list of all the “Controlling Consciousness” behaviors that you observe in yourself at the end of the week?

• Will you have that conversation with your partner that you have been putting off?

Coaching application: Make at least one request in every coaching session this week, using the language of “will you…” or “would you be willing…”

Life application: Think about one request you have for yourself. Make the request, and then respond to it.

Relevant Upbuild content:

• [Podcast] The Rules that Rule Us (Apple / Spotify)

• [Podcast] Comfort, Stretch, and Panic Zones: Where Do You Reside? (Apple / Spotify)