Creating Conscious Relationships

Most of our relationships are built on assumptions. We assume others know what we intend, what we mean, and what’s important to us. And we assume we know these things about others. But when we rely on assumption, we miss the opportunity to build trust, to engage with intention, and to connect more deeply.

Conscious relationships are those in which the implicit is made explicit. We share what’s important to us and where we’re coming from, and invite others to do the same. We ask questions. We listen. This kind of relating creates an environment that is safe, energizing, and inspiring.

As coaches, we aim to create conscious relationships with our clients so that coaching can unfold in a space defined by trust, openness, and mutual respect. We co-create the relationship, rather than assume its terms. We model the kind of awareness and courage that we hope to help our clients access in their own lives.

Some elements that support conscious relationship in coaching:

• Confidentiality

• Permission to interrupt in service of the client

• A shared commitment to feedback and transparency

• Space for experimentation and play

• A spirit of non-judgment

• Intentionally closing the relationship

Coaching application: Create your own list of “relationship agreements” for coaching. What will you name and offer at the start of new client relationships? Write one sentence about why each matters to you.

Life application: Identify one relationship in your life where greater consciousness would be valuable. Initiate a conversation to explore expectations, needs, or assumptions that have gone unspoken.

Relevant Upbuild content:

[Podcast] Designing Relationships Intentionally (Apple / Spotify)